Have a lot of new friends on here today.
Welcome
Tonight, for the first time in a long time, I pulled out my four year old Cotman watercolors, and my drafting pencil, and began to sketch and make and carve.
Frankly, it was hard at first, to make myself to sit down for long enough
To ignore Tito's chubby stomping and whining downstairs
And the UNO game going on next door
And the intense feeling of being overwhelmed that I haven’t been able to shake off since last year.
But for the first time in years, I pulled out my old Cotman watercolors and let myself study something that I found so beautiful, and wanted a copy for myself.
The beautiful thing about having a sketchbook, in which I capture whatever, whomever I want, is that
There is no reference photo, its just a little book of random paintings and sketches
There’s no realistic reference for others to judge my work, or for myself for that matter.
I often look at my sketches and forget what exactly the inspiration had looked like.
I think thats the beautiful thing about painting and making and carving and crafting.
Even if you are copying another work, something is always going to be slightly different, and small differences add up
And the copy becomes an original
And has a life and breathe of its own.
I realize there is an unfinished quality in much of my work that I am fond of.
There is always some line to finish drafting, some shadow to fill in, some color missing.
But I never really want to define it.
In many ways I have a fear of over expression, to say too much
To detail too much.
I like to let my little, goofy, baby pieces
to have room to grow
to breathe
I used to be such a perfectionist, to the point where painting and sketching never gave me much peace
But by being intentional with what is left undone
I can be happy with the outcome
Something unfinished can’t compete with perfect, pretend to be perfect. Right?
Anyways, enjoy these snapshots of my process.
I’m grateful I am able to do this, privileged to have the time to make
To reflect
To breathe
And to feel so much love for the goofies next door playing UNO.
Maybe I’ll go
join them.
